The House of Testosterone

It's not what you think....ok maybe it is, I am talking about me, and my house, it's full of the stuff. 

I wanted to talk about my boys, but didn't want to talk about how cute they were when they were born or how much they weighed (all over 9lbs by the way) I wanted to explain what it was like to live in a house with all men.

When I was younger I wished to be surrounded by men, I guess I should have been more specific.

Let me briefly introduce my 3 sons...

Brian is our first born, he will be 15 in April. I remember what I was like at 15, and I remember what my mother said to me "I hope you have a child just like you when you are a mother" well the mothers curse worked. He is the male version of me, not saying that's a bad thing, but we like to butt heads quite often.

Then there is our middle son Nicholas, he is our Christmas Eve baby and just turned 9. There is 5 1/2 years between Brian and Nick....I had a hard time getting pregnant with Nick and thus the age difference. The other 2 boys like to call Nick the angel child......and here is where the trouble starts.....he is not the angel child, he is just smart enough to know to keep quiet when trouble is brewing. That being said, he gets into plenty of trouble as well.

Finally there is Matthew, who will be turning 8 in May, if you look up the meaning of the name Matthew it means gift from God, and that indeed he was. His story is worth a blog of his own, so stay tuned for that... Matt being the youngest has to compete for everything, I can relate I was also the youngest. So needless to say Matt fights with everyone and mostly for the attention from either one of his brothers.

I cannot forget my husband Michael, my soulmate and best friend, but sometimes the leader of the pack.

That's the 4 of them, I love them with all of my heart, I wouldn't change a thing, but I would like to have my own room where I can retreat to when the need arises. 

I like this one, except I would close it up, and make it soundproof.

Now for the testosterone and the problem with it. 

Sometimes I feel like I am on a safari or some sort of expedition and I am to gather all information about what I see. Well what I see often is 3 tornados going through my house and in their wake countless messes are left behind.

My theory on housework is, if the item doesn't multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you?- Erma Bombeck

I realized a few things while studying the boys in their habitat:

I will never have a clean bathroom

They will never known where the dishwasher is

I will always find socks on the living room floor

They may never know how to change a roll of toilet paper

I am not sure if it is something that is learned or something acquired, or if they are just brilliant (I am sure they would agree the latter) but no matter what I say or do, I can't change them, and the more I think about it the more I don't want to change them (let their wives take care of that someday).

 I do want them to know that the toilet seat goes up, no need to spray all over the seat, the dishwasher is right next to the sink, socks...oh forget it I will never win that battle, and the hole in the middle of the toilet paper roll is there for a reason.

My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint- Erma Bombeck

I have gotten better about the fights they have, and they have plenty, my rule, don't come and see me unless there is blood, and if you break something, you bought it.

The happiest families are those in which the children are properly spaced....about 10 feet apart- unknown

They seem to make more of a mess when I am not around, and especially when I am working the night shifts. The reason, so I am told for the house being a mess when I am on nights...they don't want to wake me when I am sleeping...maybe this is where they become brilliant. If we tell mom we didn't want to wake her she will not be mad at the disaster in the living room.

Over the past 15 years of gathering information on the testosterone that fills the air of my house that lies in the middle of surburbia, I think I know why people tend to say "God bless you" when they find out I have 3 boys, and yes I truly have been blessed by God.

I know this...In My Life if you can't beat them, join them and have a good time at it!